FB

Facebook. FB and I have a love/hate relationship but I have to start from the beginning.
3 years ago, Peter and I decided we wanted to have a baby. We'd been married a couple years at that point and it felt like the next natural step. I figured we'd get pregnant in a few months like everybody else. Well, it didn't happen that way. It took 3 over years, 3 doctors, and countless tests/procedures to finally get where we are now. We were diagnosed with Unexplained Infertility. The good thing about that diagnosis is that they can't really find anything wrong. The bad part is that there is no magic pill/surgery/etc. that will make it better. This summer, we did In Vitro Fertilization. Our prayers were finally answered and we are now excited to move on to the next chapter of our lives.
During those years of silently struggling to get pregnant, it seemed like everybody I knew was pregnant. One of the hardest parts about dealing with infertility was feeling like I wasn't good enough to be a mom while everybody else was. I know now that wasn't the case, but it was much harder when I was in that tunnel with no end in sight. I eventually learned to cope, but I had good days and bad days.
There were many times that I logged onto FB and B-A-M, there was another ultrasound picture staring me in the face. Or another "We're expecting another little one" post. Or a picture of somebody's belly. Those usually ended up with me crying in bed and swearing to delete my FB account. 1 in 8 couples struggle with infertility which means that statistically, 36 of my friends struggle with it as well. Because of my experience, I swore I would never be the FB bad day person. Therefore, I will update my blog often with all things baby/pregnancy but you will not see a picture of my uterus or belly anywhere on FB. That way, if people want to see updates, they can come to my personal blog. If not, they will not have to face my unborn fetus each time I make a comment or new friend on FB.
I hope none of this offends anybody. I do not mean to single anybody out or make anybody feel bad. I just wanted to explain why I will not be keeping a pregnancy journal on FB.
If you want to read the entire story of our journey, you can check it out here. Warning: this has been a private blog for a long time and I am just now sharing it. It is my inner thoughts/feelings thrown out there. I do not sensor myself on that blog. The reason I am making it public now is because there were many blogs I followed of people struggling with the same thing I have been. I felt less alone and like they helped me through some of my darkest times. I hope that one day I could be able to support somebody if they are struggling with infertility like so many people have unknowingly helped me.